Poor Hannah Eaten By a Tiger In Wiltshire!

Truly Unique Epitaph, Rocking Dog

Truly Unique Epitaph

As it’s half term a gory little story for any little folk! I know how much one of my nieces loved the tragic story of Joan of Arc. Any gloomy French churches with statues, carvings or murals of poor Joan were a real hit with Cress’!

Are we all sitting comfortably, with I Pads and X Boxes off? Well then i’ll begin. There was once a lady called Hannah Twynnoy. She lived over 300 years ago in a little market town in Wiltshire called Malmesbury. She worked at an Inn called the White Horse and served frothy beer and pies, but no crisps, alas they were invented much later. One day a man bought a travelling collection of exotic animals into the yard at the White Horse Inn. In those days there were no televisions, no zoo’s, no internet and no planes to go on holiday. People had never seen creatures apart from farm animals, cats and dogs, together with wild creatures such as foxes and badgers, pheasants and toads. So, can you imagine just how excited they would have been to see peacocks, parrots, monkey’s, zebra’s and a real live growling tiger! Therefore, this man and his menagerie (that’s what you call a collection of animals) came to this little town one cold October to amaze and delight the townspeople. People paid money to come and ooh! and ahhh! at these amazing creatures, and their eyes would simply pop out on stalks! Of course Hannah was especially lucky, because she worked at the Inn and was able to see the animals every day as she hung out washing and brushed the yard. However….. Hannah who was 33, and of course old enough to know better, was VERY silly and teased and taunted all the animals. For a few days the poor animals put up with Hannah pulling silly faces, blowing raspberries and wiggling her finger through their cages…….BUT THEN…..one day… something truly terrible happened. The tiger simply had had enough! He managed to wiggle HIS paw through the bars of his cage to tease Hannah. As we ALL know Tigers have terrifyingly sharp teeth and even more terrifyingly knife like claws. Knowing that you are very, very, clever I expect you can imagine the gory rest!
So if you ever go to Malmesbury which you might find frankly a little bit boring, go in search of Hannah’s grave. It has a little poem on it called an epitaph which goes like this, In bloom of Life, She’s snatchd from hence, She had not room To make defence; For Tyger fierce, Took Life away, And here she lies In a bed of Clay, Until the Resurrection Day. I sincerely hope you will never ever tease tigers!

Incidently on the 300th anniversary of Hannah’s death, all girls going to primary schools in Malmesbury with the name Hannah each laid a simple flower on her grave.

Malmesbury is a lovely little market town, not the least bit boring, that’s unless you are ten! It’s got great little bakeries, a fantastic butcher, independent cafe’s and a helpful ironmonger.The Abbey is very beautiful and majestically imposing, Malmesbury is thought to have been the first capital of England. You can even find the tomb of the first King of England in the Abbey, King Athelstan the Glorious. To make it just a bit more interesting for 10 year olds the Abbey hosts an amazing annual Skate event within its hallowed walls. Witnessing it today was surreal and wonderful…especially if you were 10!

The Butcher...Rocking Dog

The Butcher…

.......The Baker......., Rocking Dog

…….The Baker…….

...The Happy 10 year old Maker!, Rocking Dog

…The Happy 10 year old Maker!

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